Abortion

Ugg.

Apparently we like to be really ticked off at each other in this nation and find ways to make enemies of our fellow citizens. Everyone has to have their thing and I guess this is just what America is really good at currently. Yay!

What do I think about abortion and the recent leak of the Supreme Court ruling? I’m glad you asked (Not!).

But hey, this is my blog. And my blog is the location where I dump all the stuff that is going on in my head. And lately I’ve been thinking about abortion and the Supreme Court leak and all the reactions to these things. Not because I want to though. It’s just impossible not to think about abortion lately.

Here’s where I come down on this.

I think the whole discussion is seriously flawed. It’s a no win situation. Doesn’t matter what position you take, there are no winners. Why? Because we are making arguments about abortion as if it’s something that can be compartmentalized, removed from everything else in life, taken completely separate, as if it has no impact and nothing else has an impact on it. Seriously?!? This is insane.

Show me one example from any time in history in which abortion is completely removed from all other aspects of a person’s life? I’ll wait.

This is how I know most people aren’t actually interested in talking about the reality of abortion or the implications of it being legal or not – because we are too busy keeping it an abstract issue that has no ramifications for the people who are arguing about it. It’s just some topic to be debated – another argument to be won or lost. It might as well be a question in some board game that we are playing. Or which Marvel movie is the best and which is the worst. That’s how we treat these things. We’re not really interested in knowing how these things actually impact real people. That would be messy and we’d see how complicated the issues actually are with no nice simple solutions.

Do you really want to know my position on abortion? No you don’t. Here’s how I know. Because I’m not going to just stick to abortion – even though you want me to simplify things and just say whether I’m for it or against it so that you know whether I’m a friend or a foe. I’m sorry (not sorry), but I don’t accept the premise as legitimate. My question for you is why are you avoiding the complexity of the situation? Why are you so interested in whether I’m on your side or not, rather than what we can do to actually value human lives in our nation beyond just being born.

I’m going to talk about pre-natal and post-natal care. I’m going to talk about the supply chain issues around formula that is going on. I’m going to talk about poverty and women. I’m going to talk about health insurance. I’m going to talk about how our culture doesn’t support life – how do I know? Because we refuse to do anything about mass shootings, we have been in perpetual war for decades, we have high levels of poverty and homelessness in the richest nation in history, etc.. I’m going to talk about sexuality. I’m going to talk about money. I’m going to talk about so many other things that I willing to bet that you would rather not talk about and you will do everything you can to avoid talking about.

And you know why you don’t want to talk about these things? Because none of these things offer a nice neat simple argument in which you can be for or against them, in which you get to determine who is friend and foe very easily. They are messy and complex and perplexing with no simple answers. They are integrated into one another, making it even more complex and leaving us without clear answers. Because that’s how life works. I’m so very tired of simplistic arguments about abortion – are you for it or against it – as if the topic were that easy. It’s not. If we took a moment to listen to some women who felt alone, were in poverty, and felt as though they had no clear options, maybe we’d learn something about this – not just related to abortion, but to so many other things in life.

You want to know where I am with abortion? I’m sick of the “debate” about who is right and who is wrong at the expense of people trying to live their lives when they feel lost and alone in the mess of life. That’s where I stand. If that makes me your enemy because I refuse to give you a nice simple answer – then so be it. I’m really tired of people looking to find enemies, rather than looking for ways to work with people where they can to improve the lives of the people around them, in their communities, and in the nation.

I don’t have the answers.

Here’s what I know. As I’ve done with women before who have come and talked with me about their abortion or their considering abortion – I’m going to listen to you. I’m not going to pretend I have a nice easy answer – as if this is simple and obvious. It’s not or else you would have already figured out what you need to do. You’re probably talking to me because you feel lost and you have no good options available and you know that I’ll listen. I’m going to show care and concern for you. I’m going to proclaim good news to you because you need it – the world is really good at judging you without knowing you or your situation. My gosh, I hear it in your voice and in your tears how you are judged and condemned and unsure of what to do. I’m going to make sure you aren’t alone. I’ll weep with you at the loss of your child. I’ll sit with you in the pain you suffer from having an abortion and the regret you have. I’ll listen as you explain why you had to do it. But I’m not going to sit and judge you and condemn you. That helps no one. Know this – that long after the situation has passed, those on the battlefield of debate will have moved on and forgot you because they don’t really care about you. They care about winning an argument. My calling is to love you, to care, to listen, and offer grace, mercy, and forgiveness. And to share with you Jesus’ transformative love. That’s all I know.

Where do I stand with abortion? I’m really sick and tired of it being debated, used as a tool to fundraise and get votes for candidates and political parties, used as something to make enemies of fellow citizens, used as a religious wedge to judge people, used as something to get an emotional response from people, used in so many ways.

Please, stop debating about abortion and go and help people. Go and help pregnant women, women who have given birth, children, new fathers and fathers to be, single mothers, and so many others. Stop debating and just go and help people.